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Collaboration: Do your words match your behaviour?

Collaboration Do your words match your behaviour

Words are a window into our world.

Sometimes we can behave in one way, yet the words we use tell a different story. 

With the best of intent, we may try to be collaborative, yet there is incongruency between our actions and words. This can engender distrust and a lack of engagement.

The language and phrasing we use can have a huge impact on whether people feel invited to participate and collaborate. 

Consider the phrasing shift in the following examples.

  • What do you notice?
  • What beliefs might underpin this languaging?
Phrasing shifts for

Central to collaboration are our relationships. Leadership specialist Margaret J. Wheatley states

“In organizations, real power and energy is generated through relationships. The patterns of relationships and the capacities to form them are more important than tasks, functions, roles, and positions” 

If this is so, then how might our languaging reflect our relational beliefs?

This week, I invite you to inquire into your language.

  • What do you notice?
  • What beliefs about your relationships does your language reflect?
  • Where are the congruencies and incongruencies in your beliefs, language and behaviour?

Enjoy the exploration 🙂

Reference: ​​

Wheatley, M. (2007). Finding Our Way: Leadership in an Uncertain time. San Francisco: 


Middle Leader Coaching and Mentoring

Are you a leader of an organisation or school who is intent on growing your middle leaders, but not quite sure how?

Are you spending time mentoring and coaching them on-the-hop and feel you could be supporting them better?

Maybe with the best of intent, you place them on a one-day course, but these are like a drop in the ocean; they provide some tools, but once back in the face of work, their use can fall-over. This leaves them feeling frustrated and confused, and can sometimes make an even bigger problem for you to deal with, and will eat into your already precious time.

More details here


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